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This week on Weird and Wacky Wednesdays, the legal world continues to demonstrate that real life needs no embellishment. We’ve got a TikTok lawyer getting too cozy with the bench, a government team accidentally sabotaging their own case, and a prosecutor who apparently mistook a courtroom for a Harry Potter novel.

TikTok Lawyer Plays Judge, Gets Judged

In the UK, criminal defence lawyer Mohammed Zeb is probably regretting his brief turn as a TikTok star. While waiting for court to resume at Highbury Corner Magistrates’ Court, Zeb decided to film himself seated in the judge’s chair. The video, which he proudly posted to his social media accounts, featured a smug caption about “finally making it to the top.”

The Solicitors Regulation Authority (SRA) was not amused. They issued a formal warning for unprofessional conduct, noting that the court was a place for serious legal business—not clout-chasing content creation. Zeb quickly apologized and removed the video, saying it was a joke and never meant to be taken seriously.

Unfortunately for him, jokes don’t sit well with regulators when they involve judicial impersonation. One senior barrister remarked dryly, “It’s not cosplay if you hold a law licence.” The incident now sits on Zeb’s professional record, likely ensuring he’ll never get near the actual bench—unless he’s on trial.

Department of Justice Accidentally Proves Opponent’s Case

In an incredible lapse of internal controls, lawyers for the U.S. Department of Justice accidentally filed a confidential memo in a federal court proceeding that undercut their own case. The memo acknowledged “significant litigation risk” in their legal challenge to New York’s congestion pricing program.

Intended to be internal, the memo was publicly accessible online for several hours before being sealed. But that was enough time for reporters, lawyers, and opposing counsel to download and dissect it. The document even included assessments of possible legal outcomes and alternative negotiation strategies.

The fallout was swift. The lead DOJ lawyers were pulled from the file, and the Department of Transportation called the filing “deeply embarrassing.” One insider described it as “legal malpractice in three acts.” The incident stands as a brutal reminder of how one misfiled PDF can undo months of strategy—and make a strong case for naming your files carefully.

Prosecutor Accuses Defendant of Witchcraft—Seriously

In one of the more surreal moments to come out of a courtroom this year, a district attorney in a U.S. state court raised an eyebrow (and the roof) when he suggested the defendant was engaging in witchcraft. The case had nothing to do with the occult—just a standard domestic dispute—but the prosecutor alleged that the accused was using “manipulative energies” and “casting influence” over jurors and court staff.

The judge, displaying remarkable restraint, interrupted the argument and firmly reminded the DA that witchcraft is not a recognized legal concept. The accusation was stricken from the record, and the court continued—without incense, pentagrams, or exorcisms.

The DA has since been referred to the state bar for conduct review. The defence lawyer reportedly remarked outside court, “Next time I’ll bring garlic and a silver cross.”