There is no more serious crime than eating another man’s food. And the penalty for taking a person’s snacks without permission is not nearly as high as it should be, in my opinion.
In South Carolina, a man reportedly shot his cousin after his cousin refused to stop eating his potato chips. In what is most-definitely-a-legal-defence, he did warn his cousin. But the fool just kept on eating. So what else was he supposed to do? Resorting to gun violence was really the only answer.
To complicate matters, after the shooting, Ryan Langdale then lied to the police about the shooting, stating that his seventeen year old cousin accidentally shot himself. The police bought this for a while, because the poor cousin was so badly injured in the shooting that he was unconscious for several days and could not correct the record until he woke up.
I hope Mr. Langdale was eating a lot of chips in the meantime, as I doubt they will be serving many of those in prison.
It’s no secret that alcohol lowers your inhibitions. Nor is it a secret that it also increases your emotions. So what do you get when you combine a wine store, alcohol lowered inhibitions, and increased emotions? A woman who thinks it is a good idea to recreate a scene from Dirty Dancing in the middle of the store.
Naturally.
Now, this probably would not have been such a huge deal, if she had planned it in advance and created some sort of viral marketing campaign around it. And it probably wouldn’t have been such a huge deal if she had left quietly when asked to do so. But no, she refused to leave. When the police arrived there was a scuffle, and she was ultimately arrested for trespass and public intoxication. On the plus side, there are all sorts of great jail films that she can now recreate.
Some people have a weird fascination with death. And most of those people can find that their death-obsession is amply filled by working in an industry that keeps them around the dead. Say, body snatcher, or coroner, or funeral director. But this one funeral director in Philadelphia wasn’t sated by his work at the office.
Nope, Angeliegha Stewart was fired from her job, and then criminally charged, after she took over a dozen photographs of corpses at her funeral home, sending them to friends and colleagues. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Stewart also decided to send photographs of the decedents to her ex-boyfriend, in a feeble attempt to gross him out. Revenge is a dish that’s best served cold, I guess.
If this were a crime committed in Canada, Stewart probably would have received a much more lenient sentence than the ten years probation that she got here. Rather, she would probably face a shaky mischief charge and a count or two of criminal harassment. Beyond that, there is nothing in Canadian law that prohibits taking photographs of dead people and sending them to your friends. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t in bad taste.
