Weird and Wacky Wednesdays: Volume Seventeen

This week on Weird and Wacky Wednesdays, a hodgepodge of assorted absurdities. Beginning with the case of a woman who foreshadowed her own crimes. Then, a costumed man is kicked off a plane. And he’s not even from Florida! Finally, we analyze the case of a very honest man who made a series of very bad decisions that you should never ever repeat.

All that and more! (okay, not more) on Weird and Wacky Wednesdays.

Rear view of woman in red coat with axe in hands
Oh Sweet Irony
I will still never understand how there is not a fan theory for Murder, She Wrote in which Angela Lansbury’s character is a serial killer, fooling everyone in town about her true identity and framing others for her gruesome crimes. But, at least there is a real life example of this. In Oregon, a novelist who wrote murder mysteries has been charged in the death of her husband.

But it gets better.

Nancy Crampton Brophy, the accused, did not just write murder mysteries. She wrote a very specific type of murder mystery: novels involving wives who murder their husbands. Oh, and not just that! She also penned a public essay (which has since been removed) in 2011 called How to Murder Your Husband. And, strangely, she followed her own advice (allegedly) when she gunned her husband down (allegedly) in a kitchen. The progress of this case and the role her fictional and satirical works will play in the prosecution’s theory will absolutely be worth watching.

Clap Your Hands for Security on This Plane
In Peter Pan, Tinkerbell begins to die. If Peter and the others do not clap their hands, Tinkerbell will pass away and that will be really bad for some reason. I confess I do not really remember the majority of the Tinkerbell clapping situation. But there’s good reason for that: my recollection of Tinkerbell the sweet fairy who has a crush on Peter but whose love is unrequited is blurred by this abomination. An extremely drunk man, dressed in a Tinkerbell costume, who was recently kicked off a RyanAir flight. The reason: disruptive behaviour.

I have so many questions. Why was he dressed like Tinkerbell? What did he do that constituted disruptive behaviour? Did the passengers clap when he was escorted off by security, and if so, did he take advantage of the opportunity?

But this case also raises interesting issues about the legislation of alcohol consumption on a plane. As I have both learned and seen, there needs to be better regulation and oversight of alcohol sales and consumption on a plane. I witnessed a flight attendant recently continuing to serve some very drunk air passengers because they were obnoxious and, as she stated to their faces, it was easier just to keep feeding them beer. When I was a teenager, I managed to convince a flight attendant to sell me several bottles of liquor on the plane because there was no legal drinking age in the sky. (That may not be true, but that she wasn’t sure is bad enough.)

And yes, I did just call for further regulation and enforcement on a legal issue. It happens.

Young lawyer judge sitting in the office
Whatever You Do, Don’t Be This Dude
Look. Some people (read: police officers) will tell you that honesty is the best policy. That is not always the case. Sometimes honesty is the worst policy. Take, for example, the case of Ben Ranson. Mr. Ranson got very drunk, and then made the very poor decision to drive home. However, he did not make it home. Instead, he crashed into a post.But his night of adventure and bad decision-making did not end there. Rather than report the accident through his lawyer, Mr. Ranson decided to leave the scene of the accident and drive to the police station. And when he found the police station had closed, he banged on the door until he got the attention of an officer, only to report himself for drunk driving.

On the bright side, this level of honesty and remorsefulness is a mitigating factor at sentencing. But if the offence had been committed in Canada, the mandatory minimum penalty of a one-year driving prohibition and a $1000 fine could not have been avoided, even with his ill-advised best intentions. Road to hell, amirite?

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