Weird and Wacky Wednesdays: Volume Fifteen

This week, Weird and Wacky Wednesdays kicks off with the case of a man who dived off a BC Ferry and commandeered a life raft. I will give you three guesses as to why. Then, we examine what happens when a drug bust is a lot sweeter than expected. And finally, our attention is turned once again to a fantastic concept known as irony.

All this and more on Weird and Wacky Wednesdays!


A New Favorite BC Summer Tradition
What born and bred British Columbian does not have a fond summer memory of taking the trip via BC Ferries from Vancouver Island to the Mainland, or to a gulf island, or the Sunshine Coast? Few among us do not remember the call of the seabirds, the honk of the horn, and the sight of a man jumping overboard, commandeering a lifeboat, and paddling off to Galiano Island.

Wait. I don’t remember that part.

Yes, it’s always better when these cases hit close to home. Unfortunately for the individual arrested after this stunt, he is looking at a string of serious potential charges, including mischief, theft of a vessel, and public intoxication. Unsurprisingly, it appeared the man was impaired by drugs or alcohol. Which sucks, because it kind of further eliminates the possibility of ever having liquor on BC Ferries for the rest of the province. Thanks a lot, dude.

But maybe he was just a pirate and wanted to find some buried treasure… he’ll need it for his legal fees, methinks.

Sugar: Highly Addictive, Dangerous, but not Illegal
In North Carolina, police were knocked down a peg after their celebrations following a huge drug bust were cut short. After seizing thirteen pounds of a mysterious white powder during a search warrant execution on a home, police thought they had made a $2 Million fentanyl bust. Now, doing that would be absolutely amazing and would certainly keep this dangerous drug out of the hands of addicts.

But, as it turns out, it wasn’t fentanyl. Instead, the police seized thirteen pounds of white household sugar. There is certainly a lesson to be learned here in counting one’s chickens before they hatched. Perhaps the police were taking a page from Homer Simpson? After all, the town charter clearly indicates that if foodstuff should touch the ground, said foodstuff shall be turned over to the village idiot. Maybe the police didn’t see him around.

However all is not lost. Because, as everyone knows, in America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.


Another Reason Not To Do Meth
As if you needed another reason not to smoke methamphetamine (particularly in light of the fact that the police have a new saliva testing device about to hit the streets), a man in Montana is walking free after his meth conviction was overturned. Now, I know you’re thinking, “But Kyla, that sounds like a reason to do meth!” It’s not.

You see, the Montana Man’s conviction hinged on the testimony of an expert witness. The expert provided evidence that he had analyzed the substances seized from the Montana Man, and they had turned out to be methamphetamine. Unfortunately, that evidence was deemed unreliable when it was discovered that the analyst himself had been diverting substances from the laboratory for his own personal use. Not only did he smoke meth just generally, but he also admitted that he had smoked meth while driving to court the morning of his testimony.

I only wish I had been there to see that cross-examination.

In Canada, because most drug cases proceed on the basis of the evidence of Certificates from the analyst, simply stating that a substance was a drug, these opportunities rarely, if ever, present themselves. But I will say that this does add another layer to my disclosure request in drug files in the future.

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